Honour
by Indyctator
Summary: Exhausted after a difficult mission, the Varia officers end up watching TV.


The Varia officers dragged themselves into the living room, exhausted. They had just come back from a particularly tricky mission and they just needed something entertaining to distract them. Squalo was the first to collapse on the couch, automatically switching on the TV. Two teenagers, a boy and a girl, appeared on screen. One after the other, they all sat on the couch, even Xanxus who had grabbed a tequila bottle before joining them.

"What's this about?" asked Levi.

"How the fuck would I know?" snapped Squalo. "Must be some stupid teen show where they're all bitching at each other" he added as the two teenagers were talking about scaring some bully.

"Ushishishi, why don't they just kill the peasant who bothers them?"

"Bel, you don't get it" chuckled Lussuria. "It'd be no fun to just kill that bully."

"Mu, I agree. I would definitely plunge them into hell with my illusions if someone dare bully me."

"I hated school" muttered Levi.

"Shut up" hissed Squalo. "I'm trying to understand what's going on!"

They stopped talking as a girl, apparently the bully, was led into a dark and gloomy basement.

"Ushishishi, that looks like fun. I wonder if there'll be blood!"

The Varia officers remained silent as the boy appeared and started playing with the lights while shouting hysterically at the victim.

"Voiiii! Do they really expect to scare someone with lights and shouts?" scoffed Squalo.

Just then, a bloody ghost materialized in front of the girl, the flash of lights making it all even more terrifying.

Chaos followed the sudden apparition. Levi fell off the couch screaming for his mother. Lussuria let out an extremely high-pitched cry that almost destroyed the others' eardrums. Squalo roared a flow of every possible curse words while Bel had grabbed locks of the captain's long hair to hide behind. Mammon had just vanished into thin air. Quickly coming to his senses, Squalo grabbed the remote and switched the TV off as the ghost was lacerating the girl's face. The room was suddenly filled with an awkward silence, none of them daring to look at the others.

"Are they mad?" Squalo finally said. "Showing that kind of scary shit when there could be kids watching!"

"I'm not sure I'll be able to sleep tonight" sobbed Lussuria. "Can I stay with you, Squ-chan?"

"Hell, no!" shouted the shark. "And let go of my hair, Bel!"

"I didn't expect something like this" said the Prince, tangled in the long silver hair. "Why didn't they do what normal people do? It would have been enough to torture the girl a bit then slice off an arm or a leg!"

"By the way" Squalo sneered at Levi who was still on the floor. "Need your mommy, ass kissing moron?"

"Fuck you, even _you_ were scared!"

"I wasn't!"

"Ushishishi, but you were shaking, captain!"

"Shut up, brat!"

"We were all scared anyway! The only one who wasn't afraid was Bossu!" said Levi with admiration.

Suddenly remembering Xanxus was there, they all turned to him to discover that the man was fast asleep.

"How can he sleep with all that noise?" wondered Bel.

"I don't know but I don't want to be here when he wakes up" grumbled Squalo. "I'm going to bed."

"Wait, Squ-chan" begged Lussuria. "I don't want to stay alone in the hallways!"

"Ushishishi, how dare you let a prince by himself when there's ghosts!"

"I swear this is the last time we're watching TV this late" mumbled Squalo as they all left the room.

* * *

Xanxus waited a few minutes before opening one eye. Right when the teenagers had arrived in the basement, he had had a bad feeling about what would happen and had simply shut his eyes. When he had heard his officers panicking, he had closed his eyes even more tightly. He _loathed _ghosts. But he hated the idea of his officers knowing about his fear even more. So he had just pretended to sleep, hoping they would soon leave the room.

He let out a sigh of relief. Everything was fine. They thought he was a heavy sleeper. His honour was safe.

**Note:**

_Totally random idea I got while I was watching American Horror Story! It's pretty funny to imagine them acting more... human and weak? :D_

_I hope you enjoyed that short one-shot! Thanks for reading and have a nice day :)_


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